Adopt Sheffield and Manchester accents and imagine two 17 year old boys.
Bobby: "Why the fuck you talking about me for?"
Braces: "I'm not fucking talking about you, stop being fucking paranoid"
Bobby: "Why you being like that. You weren't like this yesterday..."
Braces: (to Spanish girl) "Will you marry me - you;re fucking beautiful - I;d get you the best fucking wedding dress you've ever seen"
Bobby: "She wouldn't fucking touch you, who would?"
Braces: "Well I've had a bit of Megan (Bobby's girlfriend)
Bobby: "Fuck off"
Braces: "Anyway, who;d fucking touch you?"
Bobby: "Er...my fucking bird, obviously"
Benicassim. July 2013. (From a series)